6- Ignorant Things People Say About Breastfeeding…

Why Breastfeeding has turned into such a controversial topic, I will never know. And why people think they get some sort of “say” on how they think someone should feed their child is beyond me. Since starting my page Breastfeeding Mama Talk, almost a year and a half ago, lets just say I have pretty much heard every negative thing in the book that people say about breastfeeding. When I first joined the breastfeeding advocacy world I never knew the extent of the negative stigma that surrounds breastfeeding. I thought I would start a page to maybe help educate woman about the benefits of breastmilk and that would be it. But to think that the support page I created truly has become a place where woman from all over the world got confidence to nurse in public where they didn’t have the confidence before all because of something said on Breastfeeding Mama Talk is such an amazing feeling to me. It’s a bittersweet. Of course, I’m happy that we were able to provide them confidence, but sad that they ever felt that uncomfortable to not nurse in public, at all or stay home just to avoid nursing in public.

Image

Here is some feedback from members on my support page. Click on the pic to see enlarged version.

Okay so let me get to the point now. I just thought it was necessary for people to see that woman truly do need a good POSITIVE support system in breastfeeding. One of the main reasons is because of the negativity that surrounds it. Some of the common negative phrases nursing mothers hear:

Image

~Shouldn’t you use a cover? If you are someone who has ever said that or thought that please read this. First and foremost you should never place YOUR conditions onto someone else, especially over how they feed their child. Second, most woman I have talked to, not that they need a reason, but they say they don’t use a cover because baby doesn’t like it and will instead fight with the cover rather than nursing. I want you to try something for me. Get a drink, put a blanket over your head, and drink with it over your head for ten minutes. See how that makes you feel and how comfortable it is. Because, that is exactly how it will feel for the baby nursing. I actually did try it for ten minutes and I was in my AIR-CONDITIONED home and by the time I took the LIGHT weight cover off I was dripping sweat, I felt hot, and the whole time it was over me I felt in the dark, and just extremely uncomfortable. So why in the hell would I expect a cute little baby to drink that way any time baby is out on public? 

Image

~But if you don’t cover what if there is children around that could see? And? What if there is children around that could see? Saying that implies that what the nursing mother is doing is wrong. Nursing their child is not wrong. If you’re that worried about your children seeing one of the most natural acts a mother can do for her child then that is YOU with the problem it doesn’t mean it’s the mother nursing her child that is the problem. So I would suggest you move some place else. Or, you can use it as a teaching experience to teach your kids how babies were meant to eat and that just because formula and bottles exist there is still another method the Original method in which a baby consumes their milk. 

thankyou

~Sex is natural too, but I bet you wouldn’t condone that in public. Really?! Comparing sex to breastfeeding is like comparing apples to oranges. Yes they’re both natural, but they couldn’t be more different from each other. The fact that people even try to put breastfeeding in public in the same category as having sex in public is absurd and straight out idiotic. I think people pull that argument out when they literally have no other basis to back their side up. People have sex to make babies and for pleasure and wouldn’t have a DIRECT NEED to fornicate in public, whereas a baby cannot control their need to eat and must do so wherever they happen to be at the moment. Having sex is a want, a mother breastfeeding her child is a NEED, get the difference now? 

itokay

~Breastfeeding past age one or two is gross, if they are old enough to ask for their milk or drink from a cup they shouldn’t breastfeed, especially from the tap! Here at breastfeeding Mama Talk that is one we hear A LOT. A baby, toddler, or child never stops the need for nutrition. So just because they start talking, have a birthday, and can drink other liquids from a cup doesn’t change ANY of the benefits breastmilk gives to the child. The World Health Organization (WHO) Recommends breastfeeding until the age of two OR BEYOND. The only thing wrong about a kid breastfeeding past age two are all the people who speak their negative opinions about it. 

Image

~Okay so I get you still want your child past age two to get breastmilk, but why can’t you just pump it out and give it to them in a cup? I honestly don’t think people who ask that are intentionally trying to offend, well at least I hope not, but that is actually quite offensive to a breastfeeding mother. Saying that also implies that she is doing something wrong by not pumping out the milk and giving to the child in a cup. Just because that might make YOU feel uncomfortable or just because YOU don’t think it’s right that is just YOUR opinion. As I have stated above the WHO does not even put an age limit on when they would recommend a mother to stop. The only two people that should be concerned about when to stop breastfeeding is the mother and the child. I won’t even justify why a mother would choose to breastfeed a five year old because whatever the reason that is the business of the mother and the child. I personally don’t ever see MYSELF breastfeeding my five year old, but I fully support a mothers right to choose to breastfeed, however, wherever, and for however long, so whatever the reason she and child chooses is not my concern, nor should it be yours. 

Image

This infamous photo actually caused quite a ruckus when I first shared it almost a year ago. Facebook had removed it and I got banned off my account, even though this pic is not against any rules. So I called them out on the national news not once, but twice and they apologized. I happen to have gotten close with the girl in the pic and I tell her all the time how proud I am of her and how lucky I am to have someone brave like her to be a good symbol of tandem and extended nursing. She is a great role model to woman everywhere!

~Formula and breastmilk are the same thing. Formula and breastmilk are NOT the same at all. I could write a whole blog on the differences between the two, but since that isn’t the point of this specific blog  I will just list the main differences.  One of the amazing things about breast milk is that your milk is specially formulated to have the right composition for your baby, and to contain exactly the right amounts of nutrients. Formula-fed babies receive the exact same nutrients every time they eat. Breast milk, on the other hand, continually changes in composition so that your baby gets what he or she needs at any age. Breast milk contains more than 100 ingredients that the formula industry simply can’t duplicate. More on the differences found here. 

Image

 If you have ever said any of the six examples above then you were not being fully supportive of a woman’s right to breastfeed and came off ignorant. Placing your conditions or stipulations onto someone else especially, in regards to parenting, isn’t supportive at all and is actually quite ignorant and rude. If breastfeeding is really something you want to shield your kids from seeing that is YOUR problem and If seeing a woman breastfeeding her five year old is not appealing to YOU that is YOUR problem, it is not the mother who simply wants to nurse her child’s problem nor should it be her concern either. Saying things like, “Formula and Breastmilk are the same” is probably the most ignorant out of all six examples. Before you’re so quick to place judgments on someone else or something else, especially about their parenting, maybe educate yourself a bit further on the matter.

 ~Kristy Kemp (Creator of Breastfeeding Mama Talk)

The World Health Organization-

Comparing Breastmilk And Formula for Dummies-

Giveaway entry form-

Advertisements

23 thoughts on “6- Ignorant Things People Say About Breastfeeding…

    • Awww thank you Kianna!! I wanted to make this blog for all my nursing mamas who probably had one of those things said to them at one point or another. I know it can be hard to stick up for yourself especially around loved ones. Nurse on! ~Kristy

  1. Pingback: 6- Ignorant Things People Say About Breastfeeding… | Random Mother

  2. I love this. So, so much. I’m getting close to 1 year of nursing, and we aren’t stopping until she’s done (which doesn’t seem like anytime soon). I have heard most of these. I would also love to know how and why feeding a baby has gotten contraversal. Its just ridiculous. I love this blog and your Facebook page! They’re awesome!!!

  3. This site and your Facebook page have helped me understand a lot more about breastfeeding, baby wearing, etc. I stil nurse my 2 1/2 yr old daughter. She was 7wks early and if I would’ve known then what I know now, she would’ve never had a drop of formula or bottle as often as she did. That had a big impact on my supply, from pumping 6-8 the first 2mo to 3-4oz after I went back to work, decreasing even more having to then supplement with more formula. She’s a healthy, beautiful girl. And I’m grateful to God for giving me this amazing little angel amidst all the turmoil I’ve had to endure since being pregnant with her. Her dad and I got divorced 1 1/2yrs after her birth. I love breastfeeding, and will continue to do so until she decides. That will be a bittersweet day for me.

    Thank you for all your advice. For having a place that mothers like me can go to get advice and develop courage to stand up for our decision and our kids wellbeing/right to breastfeed. Keep up the good work.

  4. I have heard a few of these myself especially dealing with low milk supply and having to supplement, but I am determined to give my baby every bit of liquid gold i can. Thanks for being here and being so supportive of everyone’s situation.

  5. Under the section, why can’t you pump, I think the fact that not all mothers can pump needs to be addressed. I have tried pumping in an attempt to increase my supply and give expressed milk instead of formula when I have to supplement. After an hour or more pumping session, I am lucky to get half an ounce to one ounce total (both sides put together). Since I’m a stay at home mom and have baby with me all the time, it’s even harder to pump, I might as well let baby do the work since he does it better. I originally wanted to exclusively breastfeed, but my big boy will nurse for hours, come off and cry, refuse to re-latch, and it breaks my heart that he’s still hungry, so I have to give formula, but every time I do, I feel like I’m cheating him out of something better. It’s like serving pizza instead of a well balanced meal.

  6. I should clarify what I mean when I say “big boy”: he is only three months but he is wearing clothes of a six to nine month old. I plan on nursing for at least a year, maybe more due to encouragement from this cite, but I anticipate I will get dirty looks in public because everyone thinks he is so much older than he is. I’m trying to develop a thick skin about it, but it is so sad that society is this way. Even I regret saying some things out of ignorance to some of my friends who had babies before I had mine, and I wish I could take it all back. When I took prenatal classes, I was so shocked about how much information I didn’t know. I thought I had a good education, but when I realized how much was lacking, I was a bit upset that this basic biology was never covered in science or health class. Why? Maybe this is part of the trouble with society today. In school we learn so much that we never use, but Breastfeeding is something and pregnancy is a part of life, even if you are a man or may never have children, you will know someone who does. No one should be ignorant about such things. I hate that I once was.

  7. I did not breastfeed my first child because of pressure from my then mother-in-law. We were living with my then-husband’s family and I was only 19. When our second child was born a little over a year later, we were in our own home and when I told my Mom that I was going to breastfeed, she encouraged me to do so. She understood this is the natural way that God created us to be able to feed our children. My family was very accepting of my choice. I loved nursing my child. This was in the early 1970’s. I suppose I wasn’t exposed to all the negativity that is so prevalent in today’s society. I fully support Mother’s nursing their babies. The health benefits, etc to the child and Mom are well-known…did anyone mention how efficient, as well?? Meals are ready at a moment’s notice. No bottles to buy, clean. No formula to mix and warm. Wow, cost-effective. The benefits go way beyond our primary concern which would be our children’s health. My girls are now grown and they both nursed their babies. I now have granddaughters who will someday soon probably be having babies. I am thankful they come from generations of strong, confident women who will educate and encourage them to nurse their babies. And if they don’t have children or choose to nurse, they at least will not see nursing as a negative!

  8. I think that breast feeding a child is brilliant and everyone has there own opinion. If you can so it and want to no matter what people say do it!!! Me personally I breast fed by last baby and it didn’t help my baby she was still getting ill and things. Don’t think I will do it again. But the rest of you go for it and good luck and congratulation!!!

  9. Great post 🙂 Thanks for being an advocate. And in another “I appreciate your page” moment, it actually sparked a real-life friendship. My husband and I go to a local restaurant fairly often, and one of the waitresses was pregnant and due the same time I was. Because my baby was preemie they’re not the same age, but when we started going back she and I were of course swapping baby stories and found out that we both follow your page for tips and advice, and ended up becoming friends as a result 🙂

    • Oh wow that is freking AWESOME!!!!!!!!! I always wonder if I MYSELF will ever run into someone that follows my page/blogs and how cool that would be. I’m definitely sharing this comment on the page! Thank you! ~Kristy

  10. Pingback: I don’t care how you feed your baby | Aschenbach

  11. Pingback: Jockey Kayla Stra Allegedly Banned From Breastfeeding At California Race Track | Netflowers – HOME

  12. I am so pleased to come across this site! As my son approaches 1 years old and is still breast fed on demand I find that the ‘well done for exclusively breast feeding’ attitude is beginning to change to ‘really? You are still breast feeding?’
    My son is healthily above the average weight and is a delightfully happy child.
    Even if judgemental people accept the nutritional benefits, the fact that he is emotionally attached and comforted by the process is severely frowned upon! Why? How often is something that is good for us also habitually addictive? What is the negative side I ask?
    It is abhorrent that people do not see it as detrimental to the child and very cruel to snatch away something a baby has been encouraged to rely on for 12 months simply because it is convenient to do so or not good afor the baby any more to want it!
    It is also sad that when breast feeding Mothers are attacked and diplomatically explain (although they shouldn’t need to) the internationally accepted benefits that mothers who chose not to or could not breast feed take such offence they begin expressing how ‘not breastfeeding mine didn’t do them any harm’ as if choosing to breast feed and defending that choice when challenged is a direct attack on those that haven’t!!!
    I know I have had a lot to say and have surprised myself but it is obviously an issue I feel passionate about and I thank this site for the opportunity to finally express it!
    Zia

Share your thoughts here...

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s